94% of American Voters1
Celebutante Bloggers aren’t necessarily Swing Voters themselves, however Celebutante Bloggers play an important role by distracting other American Voters.
You see, despite the fact that American Voters are facing a smorgasbord of legitimate issues this Election Cycle, from the evaporation of their 401Ks to the prospect of losing their Sub-Prime McMansions to a maxed-out 29% APR credit card, Celebutante Bloggers remind American Voters that at least they are doing better than Britney!
And although most American Voters couldn’t tell you which Presidential Candidate has the best plan for health care, domestic job creation, or limiting the spread of global warming, thanks to Celebutante Bloggers, all American Voters are aware of Jaime Lynn’s baby’s healthcare, Jessica’s domestic blowjob creation, or the spread of that warming sensation in Paris’ nether regions.
Presidential Campaigns have long been tasked with distracting American Voters from the real issues that affect their lives.
However, the series of tubes that makes up the internets now makes it possible for Presidential Campaigns to outsource most of this work to Celebutante Bloggers!
1 Don’t know what Schadenfreude means.
2 And other bush sightings…