1.2% of American Retail
Tag Sale Enthusiasts are up for grabs in the 2008 Election, like the soiled piles of undergarments this Demo enjoys sorting through on their neighbor’s front lawns.1
Presidential Campaigns are haggling with Tag Sale Enthusiasts in an effort to sway these Swing Voters, even offering to throw in a broken 8-track player into the deal if it will secure their votes in 2008.
But Tag Sale Enthusiasts are unknowingly doing a great harm to our Consumer Economy with their insistence on reusing their neighbor’s old trinkets and antiques. For some inexplicable reason, Tag Sale Enthusiasts didn’t rush out and immediately spend their entire Stimulus Checks on shiny action figures from China, even though they are coated in delicious, delicious lead paint!
You see, every quarter, American Corporations are tasked with selling American Voters more useless shit than the amount of useless shit they bought last quarter.
You think that’s easy? It requires massive Advertising Campaigns to convince American Voters that they need this useless shit.
Tag Sale Enthusiasts make it difficult for these American Corporations to meet their goals, and thus further damage our fragile economy.
Regardless of which way they Vote in 2008, Tag Sale Enthusiasts need a stern talking to about the nature of Capitalism.
1 10 for $1, or Best Offer