84% of American Voters1
2008 has been brewing into quite a tumultuous year for Baristas, transforming this jittery bunch into an important Swing Voter Demographic in the Presidential Election. In previous Election Cycles, Baristas could be counted on to vote for Progressive Candidates, primarily due to their daily interactions with Latte-Drinking, Biscotti-Munching, Wind-Surfing, Baby-Killing, NPR-Pledge-Driving, Commi-Appeasing, Ivy-League-Educated Liberals.
But ever since Starbucks announced in June of this year that they will be shuttering 600 retail locations in the United States, thousands of Baristas have been forced out of their elitist $7/hr jobs and back into their parent’s basements.
Have Baristas ripened into Swing Voters that can be poached with a double shot of pandering?
1 …with an advanced degree in Philosophy.